Published on suvimahar.wordpress.com

By Dr. Suvidha Mahar

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How do we know when we’ve reached our limit?

That invisible line where we stop trying —

on people, on dreams, on ourselves.

Or the point where we snap — quietly, or with fireworks.

Is it fixed, like the boiling point of water? Or shifting, like litmus paper — turning color depending on what it’s dipped into?

Even water’s boiling point changes with altitude and pressure.

So maybe our emotional thresholds aren’t fixed either.

Some people and dreams pull us far beyond what we thought we could endure — because we feel, we hope. That if we give our all now, they’ll do the same for us someday.

But when they don’t, the disappointment is piercing.

Not because they failed us, but because we expected more.

We moved our limits for them — and assumed they would too.

Maybe expectation is the real measure of our limits.

And since expectations vary wildly, so do our thresholds.

My 100% might feel like your 50%.

And your 50% might be everything you had to give.

But what about dreams?

How long do we chase something before it stops being passion and starts becoming punishment?

How do we know when we’re chasing a vision — or just our own hope?

And then comes the hardest part — the giver’s burden.

Those who always show up, go beyond, stretch themselves thin —

they become the dependable ones.

The ones everyone expects to handle it all.

So the moment they say “no,” they’re seen as selfish.

While the ones who rarely give — the indifferent, the avoidant —

they do one kind act, and everyone applauds.

It’s unfair.

But it’s real.

And maybe that’s why the givers burn out.

Because they carry not just the task — but the weight of always being expected to.

So how do we protect ourselves?

Maybe we need an emotional litmus paper — something to test the waters before we pour ourselves in.

To pause and ask:

“Is this within my range?”

“Can I give this without losing myself?”

Because knowing your limit isn’t weakness.

It’s wisdom.

It’s survival.

It’s self-love — finally, unapologetically, and on your terms.

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If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Have you ever pushed beyond your emotional limit for someone or something?

How did you know it was time to stop?

Let’s talk in the comments below. 💬

…Suvi’s Scribbles